Post by Dustin Erikstrup on Feb 14, 2016 2:15:18 GMT -5
Hey everybody! Your favoritefunniestmost talentedsexiest most ok houseguest is back for an All-Star season! I've always wanted to play in an All-Star series, but I lacked....well, talent. Luckily for me Julie was desperaaaaate. But that's ok! Because I'm not the same Dustin McDreamy that walked into the Season 9 and 10 houses 4 and a half years ago! I'm worse. I've sucked a dick. I can legally drink. I pay rent. It's a whole new mature Dustin here. Okay as shit.that's false. But I am here because I love Julie and I love this series and I apparently signed some legal document back in Season Nine that legally demanded I be here so Julie can get better ratings and more money for a second nose job. So here we go!
Now the old Dustin was naive, optimistic and full of love. New Dustin, a cold-hearted bitch hardened by the cold harsh truths of the world (and the soul sucking effects of college) am now more critical, more analytical, and in desperate need of sleep, more money, and perhaps a nice hug.
My goals for this season are
Step One: Win a Competition
Step Two: Be a Valuable Alliance Member
Step Three: ??
Step Four: Profit!!!
It's going to be a very interesting season. I assume Julie's alcohol consumption rate will increase by 21.37%
Thank you for this opportunity Julie. I'll do you proud something.
Post by Dustin Erikstrup on Feb 14, 2016 18:00:00 GMT -5
So Julie posts the first Head of Household and reveals that we're playing the game in duos for at least this week. Drew and I chose each other because we used to be really good friends. Drew is a very good social player, but not necessarily a threat that has to be taken out of the house, I feel, so I think we can avoid the chopping block this week. It will be hard though, because all it takes is a bad relationship with one member of a duo to go up on the block. I don't want to seem like I don't deserve to be here and take Drew down with me.
The good thing is there's only 1 HoH, their partner has no say. This could be good, could be bad. I'm looking to look at it in a good way. There's no way in hell I'm going to allow myself to be the first evictee AGAIN in this series.
It's time to review this cast.
Andrew- Barely talked to him. We talked about nachos and ravioli. He watches people in their sleep for a living. I would not feel safe with him as HoH.
Britney- I love her, which makes sense. She's known for being obnoxious. I'm *apparently* the same. Idk I don't really see it. But I would love to be close with her and maybe work together if the house doesn't want to kill her. I think I'd be safe with her as a HoH except for the fact Drew has not talked to her. D:
Danielle- She only replied to me with one word responses and wouldn't give into the conversation. She's so fucking boring. She also is trying to steal Britney from Meg, which I thought was funny so I threw some shade her way. If she partners up with anyone I'm not close to, she'll go up if I am HoH. Unfortunately, she'll likely do the same.
Drew- My partner in crime. I'm excited for the opportunity to get close again.
Eddie- I haven't really gotten to talk to him yet. He did say I was funny, though, but that was literally the extent of our conversation. We'll see how that goes.
Jen- Jen and I have had our ups and downs over the years. I'm not so sure what she thinks of me. I'm going to remain positive. She might be seen as a threat and might be taken out, she might not.
Jessie- I am really excited to see Jessie! But Jessie is a really popular gal so I have to assume there's a distance between us and she is not going to be as fond of me as I am to her. I think she's a smart competitor, and I think she has the potential to be dangerous, but I like her and I don't see her putting me up immediately, but it's a possibility.
Lori- I have no clue where I stand with Lori because I didn't really get to play with her. She's played a lot of seasons though and the house might see her as a threat, but I'm going to try to be on her good side because we *don't* know each other.
(Oh my god I'm halfway through and the majority of these relationships aren't good. Plz send help.)
Marcellas- We barely talked. I feel like he and I are seen as like, the least deserving to be here, perhaps? I kinda threw him under the bus in my survey. I see him maybe being an easy nominee, or maybe I'm completely misreading him.
Meg- Meg is...interesting. She was talking to me about her saggy old lady tits covered in the crumbs of Girl Scout cookies. Also, as I am typing this, she just got denied by Britney. Which is savage. Tough luck hun.
(Also, this means I could never nominate Danielle cuz I would not nominate Britney.)
Natalie- Have I seen her yet? Oh my god my social game is shit. RIP Me.
Nick- Nick is mother fucking bae. We get along really well. I almost partnered with him. Drew and I want him to be HoH. We have an arrangement. ;D Nick is so much fun. I think we'll be really close.
Nicole- Nicole and I really clicked. We are both big nerds that really love The Flash, so I think we'll get really close. She'd be a great friend and ally to have.
Shane- Shane seems nice, we got off on a good foot. I think he's a great competitor, might be a threat. I'd like to get to know him a bit better, but I enjoyed watching him his original season.
Victoria- Victoria is my favorite. I wanted to be her partner but she already had a grouping when I saw the HoH, but I feel completely safe if she were to win. She's a riot. I just enjoy her so much.
Post by Dustin Erikstrup on Feb 15, 2016 22:52:24 GMT -5
So Nick won the Head of Household pretty nearly unanimously. I know he made a deal with Drew and I that if we gave him HoH he would give us safety. It's scary thinking he made deals to keep all these duos safe. Who is he really close to? Who will he inevitably betray? The odds of Nick being well liked enough that nearly 5 or 6 duos have him perfect/near-prefect scores is LOW. I mean, I love the guy, but he isn't the messiah.
He nominated the easy options: Meg/Natalie and Marcellas/Eddie
If Marcellas/Eddie win PoV (because I feel like Natalie will not appear), then Nick is going to have his hands tied with 4 or 5 deals, and there's no way of feeling confident that Drew and I would stay off the chopping block.
Julie also posted these three numbered doors and I'm not sure how to open them. I don't know if it's triggered by some phrase like yellow door or if an image has a hidden link somewhere on this site. I want to find it. I want stuff.
Post by Dustin Erikstrup on Feb 16, 2016 18:42:02 GMT -5
There are no nominations this week, and only one houseguest is going to be evicted! That means I have already done better than Season 9, a favorite accomplishment of mine! This is also nicer to the nominees because they only have a 1 in 4 chance at going home. More than likely, I predict Natalie will go, which is good for Meg, because she at least tries, and a lot of people like her I guess? Eddie said he thinks she will be vetoed over him. I told him I would keep him over Marcellas.
Puzzles are not my forte. I might win one competition this series. Two if I'm lucky as all hell. but there's no physical way it's going to be a puzzle. EVER. I'll be more optimistic about next week's competitions.
Post by Dustin Erikstrup on Feb 17, 2016 2:09:04 GMT -5
So I'm on this crazy magic door with hunt, right? Cuz I gotta keep Julie and Brian entertained with my bullshit nonsense. I'm wondering if the doors mean first, second, third, and maybe the one, two, three, placers in the competition get to open it. Maybe its first, middle, last (except we have an even amount of veto players so it can't really be middle). Morale of the story, I know I'm not winning this fucking heart puzzle, I know I can't be evicted, so I am like thiiiiis close *holds up thumb and index finger real close together in front of camera* to submitting a veto puzzle with like a two hour time stamp because why the fuck not? I want to open this goddamn door.